THE WOUND by gene tinelli, md

Sometimes, we do best when we learn from the millions of years of adaptation of our bodies. When we have physical wounds, we have an open port to the world that can be contaminated and is often painful. Our initial response is to cover or bandage it, thus protecting the wound from further harm. If someone or something attempts to touch the wound, we pull away and withdraw. Over time our wounds weep and leak and represent a chronic source of potential infection. We become sensitive to anything near the wound and avoid even the remote chance that it will be identified and further traumatized. Sometimes the wound becomes a source of chronic awareness from which we cannot escape. Sometimes the bandage becomes so much a part of us that we think it is normal. We start to heal when we gently remove the bandage and clean the foreign bodies from the area. Removing old crusty bandages too quickly can further damage the area. Often, the bandages are first soaked in a warm, neutral liquid so that they can be removed relatively gently. Cleaning a wound can involve some discomfort but our bodies tends to attenuate some of the pain. Our wound then slowly heals. Healing is natural process of a healthy body and encompasses two general principles. Time heals clean wounds and wounds heal from the inside out. These processes are the same whether our injuries are physical wounds to our skin or wounds to our souls. Soul wounds are acquired in simply passing through life's journey. They can also be acquired via the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. The traumas range from child abuse and neglect though loss of loved ones to war, which encompasses all known human traumas. Soul wounds are very similar to wounds on the surface of our body. They weep and allow our essence to seep away, giving us the sense emptiness and of never being whole. To avoid feeling the pain of emptiness, we apply soul bandages to the wound. These bandages can take many forms. We can attack others, or ourselves, thus protecting the wound by temporarily displacing the pain. We can withdraw from human contact, protecting our souls from human touch and intimacy. Or we can avoid the pain and emptiness by substituting substances and behaviors that dull the pain or numb the emptiness. Drugs, sex, gambling are only part of the cornucopia of potential human avoidant responses. In intimate human interactions, it is the sticky skin covering our souls that touches, adheres, and transfers our affects and emotions to others. Open wounds prevent this bonding, as touch in these cases can be painful, and we withdraw from human contact. But our souls, like our skin, heal via the same processes as the rest of our bodies. Our tears wash our soul wound clean and time heals clean wounds. Soaking the old crusty soul bandages requires love and compassion. Cleaning the wound requires courage. Soul wounds, like skin wounds, heal from the inside out, which is why this whole process is ultimately spiritual. Like our skin, our soul wounds heal to scars. We're different, marked for life. Yet, our souls have stopped leaking and can fill with basic human joy. They grow and can bond with other souls. When we bond and feel the scar on another soul, we know a healing or healed soul is a testament to basic human courage and resilience. Healing is the source of our strength.

Gene Tinelli served as a Navy Commander and military-trained psychiatrist. He has worked more than three decades with active duty personnel, veterans and dependents. “The Wound” is a response to “Soul Wound” by Anne Robinson.